Got too much on your plate?
When I was a freshman in college, I lived in perpetual fear of dropping my tray in the dining hall.
Everytime I lifted my spread of wobbling drinks and overloaded plates, I was convinced that would be the time that I’d lose control of it all and become the laughing stock of the entire student body.
While that was more than 20 years ago (and I never did actually drop my tray), that same sinking feeling comes back over me every time I think:
“I am carrying way too many things, and it’s only a matter of time before it all comes crashing down.”
(So, daily? 😜 )
Thankfully, I now know that I don’t have to live in a state of constant stress and fear. Instead, when that feeling of overwhelm comes over me, I pause and ask myself two simple questions…
1. “Can I change what I’m carrying?”
I know I’m not alone when I say that I put WAY more pressure on myself than anyone else. So, when I take an honest look at my to-do list, there are always a few things I can take off to immediately relieve the pressure valve.
Next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, try writing down ALL THE THINGS you “have” to do, and then ask yourself…
What is most important for me to get done this week?
What can I move to next week (or next, next week)? Where might I be able to re-negotiate a deadline with someone?
What can someone else do for me? And how quickly can I ask them for their help?
What can I take off my list entirely? For me, this often looks like an unrealistic fantasy “make a homemade dinosaur cake for my son’s birthday” that I’m happy to replace with a do-less alternative: “buy some cute cupcakes from the store.”
What’s 1 thing that will only take me a few minutes that I can take off my plate right away?
And sometimes even after you’ve pushed things off and delegated others, it still feels like you have too much to carry. When I’m having one of those weeks, I ask myself …
2. “Can I change the way I’m carrying it?”
If you’ve still got an overflowing plate, consider asking yourself…
Can I hold it as important, without taking it (and myself) too seriously?
Can I hold it in my heart, and not so much in my head?
Can I hold one part of it at a time, rather than trying to hold (and do) it all at once?
Can I hold it with confidence and grace, trusting in myself and my abilities?
While these two questions are simple, it takes time and practice to train yourself to slow down … let go … ask for help … and disentangle your self worth from how much you get done in a week (phew!).
Most of us have been taught to power through and get done more than is humanly possible with the time that we have, so be patient and understanding with yourself as you try a different way.
Now, I’d love to hear from you! What “aha’s” have you had while reading this post? What else works for you when you’re carrying too many things? Share with us in the comment section below.
Jen xo
